Ripped from the headlines/When politics rips families apart

      Every morning at work, I read a number of newspapers to make sure we didn't get beat on any worthwhile stories. Usually, I'm happy to note, we don't. I work for a great paper that does a great job covering New Jersey and, sometimes, beyond. Today, though, The New York Times ran a news feature we didn't have. In our defense, the story is unfolding outside of our official coverage area, and the competing N.J. newspaper that does cover the area missed it too, but neither is a real consolation.

      In truth, there's nothing smile about in a story about two brothers -- grandsons of Italian immigrants -- who aren't speaking to each other because they're on opposite ends of the immigration debate. It's impossible not to feel a little heart-heavy for the widowed mom who worked three jobs to support her husband died when they were teens.

      According to the Times, Steve Lonegan, mayor of Bogota, NJ, who became known for his campaign to make English the official language of his town and for fighting against a McDonald's billboard (we wrote that story), has become estranged from his younger brother, Bryan, who was until recently an immigration advocate who is developing a legal clinic at Seton Hall University School of Law for immigrant workers. The two, the Times reported, were once close enough that Bryan, after becoming disappointed with the Clinton administration, joined the Republican Party to oversee his brother's bid for mayor in 1995. Now, they can't even share a meal, the Times article said.

      Just before reading the article, I had words with my own sister. We didn't bear our teeth or swear never to speak to each other again, but, looking back, I was still a little jarred. Life is too short to waste time avoiding the people we love.

       But when the people you love are making decisions that affect the lives of others in ways you find untenable, how do you choose the right path? It's a lesson the Lonegan brothers are figuring out the painful way.

       Oh, and Shannon and I? We're okay. Even if we disagree.